Fart Fone

I was in the bathroom finishing up my pee session when a woman walked in on her cell phone. I thought she would hang up before she started her business, but she continued yapping as she peed. Her butt cheeks then opened wide and let out a massive boom of an explosion. She was completely unfazed by this as she proceeded to have a normal conversation on her cell. I would have been mortified not only by farting uncontrollably in the presence of another, but also because the person on the other line undoubtedly heard her fart and figured out she was relieving herself as they talked. Kudos to farty phone lady and her confidence (or lack of shame). But shame on her because she left the bathroom without washing her hands. I covered door handle with a paper towel as I exited the bathroom.

I can totally hear you.

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