I got my wish. I’ve been constipated for a few days, and my torn sphincter has healed– no more itchy butt. I had a bowel movement this morning after three days of no pooping, it felt like a boulder was going to exit through my bottom. I sat on the toilet and waited. Nothing was coming out. This could only mean that my turd was too big to push through my tiny hole. I was scared. I didn’t want to re-tear my a-hole and see blood on the toilet paper. Bloody toilet paper should only happen when my vagina has its monthly tantrum. 20 minutes passed and my legs were going numb. Finally at minute 25, a tiny nugget fell out. Then a few more nuggets slowly dropped until the toilet was filled with a mountain of poo pebbles. Goat poopies!! I emptied my colon without tearing my bunghole. Happy Friday!