Greetings lovers of poop. I’m back.
I stopped blogging about my poops ’cause how much can you really blog about your regularity? My poops have all been the same. I ran out of stories.
But then I moved offices and got a brand new cube mate. He’s an older gentleman, and he likes to fart. And he’s not ashamed to do it.
Today he let out a few single toots. One early this morning, and a few late this morning. But just now he let out a single, and he followed up with a double whammy (he even lifted his butt cheek). I’m not sure if he’s hard of hearing (he’s old, and he also wears earbuds for music) or he just doesn’t give a fuck about farting in public, but my lungs feel violated. It was funny at first, but breathing in his colon can’t be healthy, right? I mean, it’s cool that he’s not afraid to fart in public and I don’t even mind if he does it everyday (it hurts to hold in farts), but I don’t know if I can take this effluvial abuse multiple times a day everyday. I feel like my nose is getting gang banged from 8am – 5pm Monday through Friday.
This must be my punishment for my past years of describing my dumps on this blog.