Wedding Diet

My wedding is fast approaching, so I’ve been eating healthy the last week and restricted my diet to chicken breast and broccoli. I’ve also increased my water intake and completely cut out sugar and starches. I thought my upped fiber and fluid consumption would produce the most amazing poops, but


Growing old is no fun. Yesterday I bent over and farted. I didn’t know I was going to fart. It just happened, and I didn’t have enough reaction time or sphincter strength to keep my butt from honking. I would not have thought twice about this if it happened at