Ask the Doctor*

A few people have stumbled on this site because they were searching “how to get rid of turtle head pain.” Hehehe.. sorry, but that’s funny. My advice* on how to get rid of turtle head pain is to take a dump. If you can’t take a dump because you’re constipated,


I was speed walking to the bathroom to drop a mad deuce, when I ran into a colleague. Usually, I say a quick hi and go on my way, but this time I had the misfortune of running into the office motormouth. My turtle head was about to bust past