I live by the three-second rule. If food (preferably dry food) falls on the floor, I have three seconds to pick it up, dust it off, and eat it. I dropped a potato chip on the floor next to my desk. I picked it up, blew off the cooties that
shit
Public Restroom Stories
Friend: I went out to the bathroom to take a shit. But as I was walking there, some guy was also walking in to the bathroom, and he looked at me very intently. I was pretty sure he needed to take a shit too, so I walked past the bathroom,
Shit-a-Burger
If you’ve been keeping up with my posts, you’ll know that I’ve been taking L-carnitine and that my poops have been glorious. I usually have one massive poop a day, but sometimes I produce two mediocre dumps. A side effect of L-carnitine is a decrease in appetite. This is slightly
