Fart Dodge

It is super hot and sunny and humid and muggy here. It’s so disgusting that it’s hard to breathe. I was at a very large and busy crosswalk on Broadway, packed in between people like sardines, waiting for the light to turn green. The girl in front of me whispers to her boyfriend, “Babe, my stomach kinda hurts.” And then five seconds later I smell what was hurting her stomach. It was bad. Very, very bad. I had no where to escape being trapped in this herd. As soon as the light turned green, I made some quick Frogger type moves and got around the tooting girl and then cleared out the fart from my lungs and filled it with fresh car-exhaust air instead. Then a few seconds later I walked through old urine scented air. Ahhh. Don’t you just love NYC in the summer?

Dodge the farts

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  1. nick | | Reply

    Poor you… If I were you, I’d start walking faster and while being right beside this lady I’d pay her back!

    Once my brother was walking down the street behind a guy who was smoking and the thick trail from the cigarette was following him. My brother started coughing, but he seemed to not care about it. Suddenly my brother got so pissed off and started walking faster then ripped a huge fart right next to the smoker that he literally jumped in fear lol
    Flatulence always win 🙂

    • pooter | | Reply

      Good for your brother! I hate it when people smoke around me!! Especially if I’m on an empty street and the smoker decides he/she wants to stand next to me and light one up. If I was as talented as your brother and could fart on cue, I would do that too. lol

  2. nick | | Reply

    I feel the same way… I hate smokers! I promise that one day I’ll take revenge on them using my rancid gas.
    But on the other hand I wonder what’s worse: to smell someones fart or the smoke of the cigarette lol Farts don’t cause the lung cancer from breathing them in… at least I haven’t heard about any case before 😛

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