It was a great start to the new year at the office yesterday. I had a yogurt for breakfast followed by a couple multi-vitamins. I’m not sure which of the two did it, but I had the worst diarrhea gurgling all morning after breakfast. It was LOUD. So loud that people sitting two cubes down could hear it. The sound was horrifying.. it was like I had an alien inside me taking a watery shit. I tried to poop in the office bathroom, but all that escaped from my butt were bubbly machine gun farts. I had a meeting that morning, too. I don’t think the client nor I could concentrate with all those farty noises shooting off in my abdomen every three seconds. I don’t want to be known as Fart Girl.