Chipotle Poo

I ate Chipotle last night. I don’t eat there very often, so I was a little slow when deciding what I wanted in my burrito/salad/bowl/whatever else they have, but I was the only person in line so I didn’t try to rush my order. When I got to the salsa part, there were a few options to choose from. I asked the girl (who really took a disliking to me) which was the mildest salsa. She pointed to it. I asked her to give me a very small amount because my wimpy ass cannot handle spicy food. She gave me a ginormous scoop. I think that was more than the normal amount they usually give. Whatever, it was the “mild” salsa, so it’s all good. I get it to go and eat my beef salad at home, and my mouth is on fire. Bitch gave me the hottest salsa. I am shooting flames each time I exhale. I drank about 5 glasses of water with my salad. Throughout the night, I was constantly getting out of bed to pee, and I couldn’t sleep because my stomach had painful diarrhea gurgles. This morning I squirted mush out my fartbox. That part was cool, except it burned while it was exiting my hole. Damn that Chipotle girl. She just jelly ’cause I got a hot ass that can out-fart her.

Bunghole enemy

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