Poo Log: 25 Feb 2016

Type: Mushy. Oozed out of my butt, resulting in embarrassing sputtering noises heard by coworkers in the hallway outside. Poop disintegrated on contact with toilet water. Bits of floating and sunken poo particles separated from main dung mass. Smell: VERY BAD. Where: Office bathroom (single person bathroom with sink) Time:

Poo Log: 23 Feb 2016

Type: Large, girthy, solid log with very tapered, slightly curved ends. Smell: A little stinky. Not too terrible. Where: Office Bathroom (single room with toilet and sink) Time: 10 AM. Was a busy day at work, had to go earlier but held it in until my butt was about to explode.

Sorry

Dear leftover refrigerated chicken meat, You looked delicious in the container, but when I popped the lid your stench hit me hard in the face. Why do you smell like fart? I did not microwave you, and you’ve already stunk up the office. My coworkers are angry. Please say you’re