Poo TKO

As some of you may know, when I use the public restroom I like to line the front of the toilet bowl with toilet paper to eliminate any pee splashes. I am also an edge sitter— I sit at the edge of my seat. When you combine those two, I end up peeing directly on the toilet paper when I need to tinkle. When you combine the toilet paper lining and edge sitting with a bowel movement, I end up pooping on the toilet paper as well. This is great because I minimize any poop splashes so my cheeks stay dry. And since the poo lands on the paper, it is above water. That way you can inspect your poo and see what kind of nastiness you can recognize in the log. Fun! The only downside to this is the smell. The poo being above water makes the stink factor go way up. I had a messy poo today, so it took more wipes than usual to clean. As I was wiping and hovering over my exposed poop, the smell really got to me and made me a little dizzy. My own stench almost knocked me out. That’s pretty bad. I need to lay off the sushi.

The last one works for me.

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