Fizz Fizz Plop Plop

I missed an awesome pooping opportunity, and now I have messed up my bowels. I don’t usually drink Coca Cola (I consume one can every few months, and I rarely finish an entire can), but when I do treat myself to a can of delicious fizzy syrup, it gives me intestinal gurgling that leads to sludge out my bunghole. I had a Coke Wednesday for lunch, and about 2 hours later, I had a gurgly bowel movement. Had I gone to the bathroom at that moment, I would have dropped at least a pound of mush out my butt. But I stayed at my desk to finish a few more minutes of work.. those few minutes turned into 30 minutes, and by then the urge to poo was gone. It is now Friday and I still have not pooped. I guess I’ll open another can of whoop ass.

Whoop Ass

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